To coincide with RipTen’s review of Magicka, the awesome folks over at Paradox Interactive have given us five copies of the game to give away to our awesome readers. We were originally going to try and use them to bribe the UN and take over the world, however we thought giving them to you guys would be easier.

Want to win a copy? Simple! We want you guys and girls to come up with a spell and tell us what it would do. Wacky, zany, crazy, outrageous, we want to hear all of your ideas!

The five winners will be announced and contacted on Friday the 11th of February. Make sure to enter your REAL email address in the email field so we can email you and let you know you’ve won. Good luck and get casting!

[You Can See the Winners By Clicking Here]

41 COMMENTS

  1. Maybe a spell that would conjure cacao, milk and hazelnuts. With enough heat and magic, you could make Nutella with it. Well, since you have Nutella, what else would matter in the world? Right?

  2. How about a spell called the Turducken, cast it and you will watch you enemy turn into a turkey, then a duck, then a chicken, then finally devolve into an egg, and you can swash the egg to kill the enemy.

  3. I propose a spell with the unspeakable power of turning any situation into a Musical, converting every attempted movement into dance and every dramatic action into song.

    Imagine, those goblins you were fighting for dear life, now shooting at you with rhythm and mojo, singing their folk rhymes in choir as they try their best at murdering you.

  4. How about a Spell Which can turn Your enemy Into a Chocolate Bar,These Way one day you can will Have Enough Chocolate to live with,And No enemy.

  5. Bubble Launcher: A spell that summons a huge horde of bubbles which trap the enemies and make them fly around so we can play skeet shooting with them.

  6. A spell that recasts itself, causing an infinite loop of recursion that destroys all enemies in the area. It also destroys yourself. Oops?

  7. “Summon Woman”. The player summons a female wizard who is identical to the male hooded version, except that the lower half of her robe is of course a miniskirt. Instead of casting spells, the female wizard pulls out of small kitchen table and furiously starts making sandwiches. The sandwiches are then dropped on the ground where the player can pick one up and use it as a sword. Wielding a sandwich allows the crossing of beams of opposite elements. Obviously =)

  8. A LIGHT spell would be nice. On its own deals damage and causes blindness, and combined with fire and earth could make THE SUN(lol wut?) or SunStrike.
    Another good spell could be SOUND. Alone it would deal damage in wave forms, and combined with other elements could create dizyness.

    Light + Sound could be a good combo for fear(Monsters running away from you :)) -> crazy :D, could add a nice touch to the game as well as more laughter when you would stike your buddies with it =)) LOL).

  9. “Popcorn Machine” Earth, Life and Fire Magicka.
    Summons a Popcorn Machine which heals all nearby units but if you stand close for too long you get fat and move slowly as well as a increased resistance to push back effects, can be dispelled by casting arcane on your self.

  10. “Polymorph” transform enemy(or enemies) into a random mob/mobs. Enemy be transformed into a non-aggresive mob(chicken, cow, sheep etc.) or it can change into another enemy. Imagine trying to transform goblin into a harmless sheep and getting snow troll instead:D

    For more fun there can be a very small chance that polymorphed enemy could turn into random boss:)

  11. Turns all monsters on screen into slimes, everyone who touches the slime causes one random character on the screen to die.
    let’s roll the dice

  12. A spell that when cast, something random would appear. It could be anything from a battle axe to a mouse. Anything’s possible!

  13. A spell that shoots a toaster onto the floor, with bread in it. The enemies stare at the toaster for a second, then the toaster pops the toast out, causing the enemies to flinch, temporarily stunning them.

    Works on humans as well as goblins.

  14. A spell that automatically wins me any giveaway, regardless of the magnitude of the award and the conditions for its achievement.

    P.S.
    I’ve cast it just now.

  15. Porkageddon:

    Fire, Earth, Life
    Pigs fall from the sky, gravely injuring any enemies or allies they come in contact with. Their corpses may be blasted with a simple fire spell to cook up some sweet, delicious (and healing!) bacon.

  16. I propose a spell that revives Barry White and Marvin Gaye, thus providing an enormous increase in world population due to their baby-making songs.

  17. My spell would require about five seconds of charge up time, during which sentences of speech would flow from around your character into the tip of your staff, detailing just how screwed the population will be within the AOE i.e. “Ok in a few moments the place where you are will be history…Seriously, I mean OMG, the projectile that will be coming in your direction will probably change your nationality on impact”

    After the charge up period is complete, you release a searing orb of pure awesome that leaves a trail of all the obscene words from the 1930s(i.e. Jack-ninny) floating in the air. Once the searing orb quickly makes its way to its POO(Point-of-OWNAGE), a blinding light explodes forth from the POO, a choir of angels sing out in beautiful harmony that “You Are Screwed”, and hundreds of disembodied ninja/samurai hands, giving the last karate chop of their career, speed forth delivering blows of such magnitude that songs will be written every time this happens.

    Once the moment of pure awesome is over, the lucky creatures near the edges of the screen are left with ringing ears and a need for prescription eye glasses, and the creatures who suffered the full brunt of the spell lie flopping in small puddles of water because they are now Freddi Fish with Colon Cancer.

  18. Revenge!
    Life, arcane, fire

    Creates a pact with Vlad. Any ally that kills you is summoned back to life (if dead) and killed the exact same way you were by Vlad himself!

    Can create an infinite loop of hilarity if cast by all until Death himself steps in.

  19. A spell that casts a fog screen upon the enemy. The fog screen can last for a designated amount of time (like 5 seconds). The enemy would not know where you are (or where anything is for that matter) and would not be able to attack you. Also, since the enemy doesn’t know where it is, it would add humor as it spontaneously runs into random objects nearby or runs into other enemies.

  20. Or the “fog screen” could be Nerve Gas (nerve agent). According to wikipedia’s link for nerve agent, “Poisoning by a nerve agent leads to contraction of pupils, profuse salivation, convulsions, involuntary urination and defecation and eventual death by asphyxiation as control is lost over respiratory muscles.”

    Thus, any of these effects of nerve gas could be the result of the nerve gas cast by the spell. Like it would add humor to see the enemy or even an ally falling and having convulsions, or having involuntary urination.

  21. A bobble/balloon spell! You could cast it on an enemy and he would be caught in it, then he would fly in the air (the height could be variable, or it would depend of how much of an element was used), after a while the bobble pops! When the enemy falls he receives some damage.
    You could also cast it on yourself then you would also fly in the air or just bounce of the ground.

    Hope you like this idea. :)

  22. Napalm strike, calling in an airplane that drops burning grease over a random part of the map, certainly working inside rooms of course.

  23. A Spell that would create rainbow colored black holes!
    possibly the most colorful and dangerous spell known to man
    it would vacuum in everything and anything even it’s caster at a slow but unstoppably colorful rate.

    It would look deceivingly innocent with it’s vibrant colors and swirling motions, and would trick any one of it’s actual nature, which is a dangerous black hole until their in it of course,

    And the only way to cancel such a colorful black hole is to cast one of identical size near it with the opposite set of colors swirling in the opposite direction of the first black hole.

    It would be pure colorful chaos at it’s best :)

  24. My spell would summon a massive horde of lightly dressed women charging into the battlefield. They would swarm the enemies before transforming into bald, obese men smelling of old cheese and tuna sandwiches left in the sun for three weeks.

    The stench would paralyze the enemies, allowing the abominations you have summoned to hurl themselves into the enemy ranks like a small child jumping into a ball pit for the first time, causing panic and terror as they scramble to evade the fat and odor.

    Eventually, all enemies would get trapped under the enormous beer bellies, trapped like a pizza slice in the belly button of an advanced couch potato, perishing with the final “Oh god, WHY?!?” going through their minds.

    It would be awesome…

  25. An antimatter spell. For this you will need to combine arcane with life (you also need a bit of fry and a bit of laurie to actually do that). The spell has a 99% chance of succesfully blasting your enemies into billions and billions of atoms. Otherwise it will turn you into a harmless Oompa-Loompa (du pa dee da)

    WARNING: 1. It does not work in vacuum.
    2. The spell does not come with a particle collider needed to gather the antimatter

  26. Spell called angry beans. You self cast it and your character farts. The area with the fart is lethal to enemies and friends alike. Especially to friends.

  27. liposuction spell: which sent the fat you don’t want and send it to Rosie O’Donnell(BTW it won’t make a difference on her).

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