Now that you’ve got the inevitable “WTF?” out of your system from the headline, feast your eyes on the newest Skylander Giant. He’s big, he’s made of rock and his slogan is, “It’s Crush Hour!” (and now it all makes sense). That’s right, heeeeeeeeeee’s CRUSHER!

Filling the Earth elemental slot in the Giants lineup, Crusher is one of the eight extra-large figures designed for use in the sequel to 2011’s breakout hit from Toys for Bob and Activision. To my wife’s chagrin (and my children’s glee), the release of the game will herald the release of 16 new characters in total along with “Lightcore” figures that presumably will glow thanks to the Portal’s luminescence. It also makes sense that fans of the mobile game Skylanders: Cloud Patrol will have no characters to look forward to. Do yourself a favor, save those little ID tags that come with each character. It’s far easier to enter the information into the app from them rather than swapping the figures on and off the portal to get the codes.

Skylanders Giants is slated for an October 21, 2012 release on Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, Wii, 3DS, PC and mobile platforms. My wallet is set for rapid weight loss on that day. My body is planning to be evicted from my bedroom that evening, because, “If you love your Skylanders so much, you can just sleep on the couch with them.”